I don't want anyone to get my wrong here, I LOVE Logan, I love USU and I know being here is the best thing for me and I haven't been home sick all semester... but today at work I nearly broke down because I was thinking of all the past chapters of my life that I just REALLY miss at the moment.
I really miss my high school days hanging with Kris and Ian doing absolutely nothing sometimes and just being goofs. Fighting what we would listen to, what movie we should watch, fast food runs...ditching ap music theory....I really miss our deep gospel conversations and reading and interpreting scriptures together.
I miss living in LA, I remember feeling so grown up living in downtown....even though I was living with my grandma. I miss those nights we would both stay up all night sitting in my room as she gave me advice on life and shared love stories between her and my grandpa teaching the true meaning of eternal love.
I miss being so close to my dad. For those of you who don't know my parents are divorced and he's always lived about an hour away from me and so we would only spend time together twice a week, but living in LA we would eat lunch together everyday and we grow super close. He's always been a good father but we got the most comfortable with each other over those tuesday tacos, thursday in and out, and friday italian. We developed all these new inside jokes and it was no longer this disciple-advice relationship but we became good friends.
I even long for the time I had to move back home and commute a hour+ to school everyday...oh but those wild carpools made it worth it. Long chats with Trent about anything and everything with disney or oldies being our official soundtracks,
or the silly moments with Barbara blasting rap music we both don't like singing along and throwing up fake gang signs. I miss adventures with my bestie bar-bar.
I miss how we would randomly decided to go window shopping after class, or just stop in a random city to get munchies or just walk around. I even miss my half-conscience ramblings where I would tell her random things...
I even miss the times where I would have to stay at school hours after my last class waiting for Barbara, but it's okay because thats when Pablo and I would take our craziest adventures throughout the city of Pasadena. We would just walk and walk and walk until we couldn't take it, hit a park with some frozen yogurt or ice cream, sit on a bench and just tease each other and actually be sad when our time was up.
I miss my brother waiting up for me in concern. He would ask me everyday how traffic was, if there were any boys giving me grief as we shared a late night snack before bed.
I feel really weird. Like...almost forgotten. I have little time to stay connected and maybe people think I don't care, which is most certainly not the case. I mean I LOVE my new sorority sisters and all the friends I have made so far at USU but no one can replace my closest childhood/high school friends who know absolutely everything about me. I've become very jealous of those who get to go home every weekend or have family close enough to just drive up and visit. I haven't seen my mother in months which is killing me. I guess as time draws closer to go home I get more and more anxious...two more week!